The Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt has given the NHS a huge 70th birthday present by temporarily resigning from his role and emigrating to Uranus.
According to Whitehall sources, Hunt will be spending five years on a fact-finding mission, while compiling a dossier about the finest forms of space rock for his next private bathroom at the Department of Health.
Privately, there was originally plans to send him to Mars first, but concerns were raised about the atmosphere being able to sustain human life.
One aide said, ‘He’ll be fine in outer space. His ego has its own gravitational pull.’
The President Of Uranus Flibble Jigglepuff-Nikkinakkinoonoo said, ‘We are honoured to be hosting such a prestigious figure.’
’Our TV signal here from Earth is much delayed, but we love sitting down on Saturday evening and watching Jeremy run around while pretending to crush people’s cars while wearing funny disguises.’