Emergency doctors at Southend Hospital have told local man Perry Gauze that he is ‘lucky to be alive’ after a drunken pub bet to put his TESTICLES into a modern Dyson Airblade hand dryer ended in disaster. Mr Gauze, 24, believes that losing one of his testicles was a ‘small price to pay’ for the £5000 that his wealthy friend paid him to carry out the ridiculous dare, and he has already told his long-term girlfriend that they can still dream of raising their own family. 

In a Southend News Network EXCLUSIVE, Mr Gauze spoke to our Chief Reporter about his ordeal. He said: ‘We always drink at The Oaks in Leigh On Sea every Friday night, and my mate noticed last week that the landlord had installed those Dyson hand dryers in the toilet that shoot out highly-concentrated jets of warm air as you move your hands up and down. They were all pretty low down on the wall, and the extra-low machine for disabled users was too tempting to pass up. He promised me five grand if I could keep my balls in there for 60 seconds, and I really wanted the cash for my wedding in 2018. Seven pints later, I found myself completing the challenge, and I thought at the time that everything was OK. However, when I got home at 1am, my girlfriend Stacey noticed that my little fellas had swollen up to the size of LEMONS, and I was rushed to A&E at Southend Hospital.’

Dr Marvin Ghosh was the first medical professional to attend to him. He said: ‘It took 24 hours for the swelling to go down, and we had to remove his right testicle due to excessive blood vessel damage – luckily we were able to save the other one and he should be able to resume sexual activity within three months. As a precaution, we are contacting all pubs with these Dyson hand dryers to ask them to get warning stickers added, and my message to other local men is that these hygienic machines are strictly for hands and wrists.’

A statement from Southend Medical Trust said: ‘While we wish Perry well for his recovery, this regretful incident is a reminder of the huge pressure that excessive alcohol consumption places on our frontline services every single weekend. In our opinion, this type of injury is entirely preventable, and better education should stop other Essex men from suffering the same fate. He has given us permission to use a photo of his battered ‘intimate area’ in an upcoming leaflet campaign and social media promotion about cutting down alcohol abuse in South Essex. ‘