BREAKING: There’s A Van Outside


We are getting reports that there is a van parked outside.

Shortly after 11am today, images were posted on the Southend Crimespotting Facebook group to confirm that a van had been spotted driving around slowly before coming to a standstill.

In a further worrying development, numerous members of the group confirmed that the driver of the van ‘looked foreign.’

One poster said, ‘It’s a van. Jesus fucking Christ we’re all going to die.’

‘The fella could be doing anything. Giving information to burglars. Counting my dogs. Running a paedophile ring. Looking for an address as he is unfamiliar with the area. Anything.’

Another posted, ‘Just posting this pic to make everyone aware as a Volkswagen Crafter pinched my arse once and called me ‘sugar.’

‘It might be nothing, or it might be something.’

The group’s admin user Michelle Garridge said, ‘Just seen the air ambulance as well. Is someone ill or injured, or is it perhaps one of those ‘everything’s ok’ helicopters?’