If you fancy a free holiday to Centre Parcs, you have to be quick!

Centre Parcs have ordered too many holidays from their supplier and they can’t be returned because they have now been handled in an environment where nuts are used.

Our spokesperson Momo said, ‘This online craze thing has led to a number of exciting opportunities for me like this promotion.’

’There are some similarities anyway. Their mini golf prices are enough to give anyone a coronary.’

In a late development, it was also revealed that the first 20 people to comment ‘Fuck me I’m gullible’ will also receive a slightly soiled RV and a round the world first class flight on Virgin Atlantic with five full stops at the end of ‘Atlantic.’

Image: Ben Gadsby-Williams