There has been an angry reaction online after it was announced that the caliphate of Islamic State has been invited to enter the 2019 Eurovision Song Contest in an ‘act of friendship.’
The show is due to take place on May 18th in Tel Aviv, and many have expressed concern about their chosen song, The Heroic Goats of Raqqa.
According to sources in the Middle East, the tune glorifies the work of the caliphate’s ‘Intelligence Goats’ – animals who are specially trained to gather information about members of the population who may be breaking the law with non-regulation beards.
One said, ‘There are also concerns that the lady singing it will actually be performing to a pre-recorded vocal track as she will be in full Islamic State-approved clothing while she is on stage.’
‘A few of the other acts have made an official complaint because the song doesn’t change key at least three times, but an exemption has been granted by the contest organisers because modulation isn’t allowed in any IS-controlled territory.’
Bookmakers have already predicted that the song will get more points than the United Kingdom’s entry.
Jurgen Schmurgen of the official Eurovision Fan Club said, ‘To be honest, the UK might as well just put an overweight, topless English Defence League supporter on the stage to scream the line ‘fook yurrop’ over and over again.’
In a late development, it has also been confirmed that viewers in the United Kingdom will not be able to vote in this year’s contest.
A statement from the organisers read, ‘These people Googled ‘What is the EU?’ the day after the referendum, so bollocks to letting them have a say on something as important as this.’