A spokesperson for the BBC has confirmed that the hit TV show Challenge Anneka will return for a one-off special where Anneka Rice and the rest of the team will build a Brexit-friendly border between Northern Ireland and the Republic.
According to industry insiders, EU negotiators have already secretly agreed to just let the show take care of the whole Irish border issue so that talks in other areas can progress.
He added, ‘This will be Anneka’s biggest challenge yet.’
‘Her brief will be to build a border that is both there and ‘not there’ at the same time – pretty much a ‘Schrödinger’s Border’ if you will.’
‘With her skilled team of builders and customs officials, they will be racing against the clock to come up with a frontier that is hard and soft simultaneously, but it must also avoid leading to a situation where certain men with beards can only appear on TV with someone else’s voice.’
‘In many ways, it’s going to be like that time in 1991 when the team constructed an entire primate sanctuary for 200 creatures from scratch in three days, except with more hairy red-arsed baboons.’
The news comes at a particularly sensitive time in the Brexit negotiations, with Brussels sources confirming that a ferocious negotiating session on Friday evening resulted in Boris Johnson being offered a £40bn Brexit divorce payment or the chance to take ‘Bully’s Star Settlement.’
One witness said, ‘He took a moment to think about it while the board spun around, but then decided that someone who can’t find his arse with both hands would probably struggle to make 101 in six darts.’
‘Shame really, as it turned out to be a speedboat.’