A Community Speedwatch volunteer from Essex has exclusively revealed to Southend News Network that he gets a ‘raging mega boner’ whenever a motorist passes him at 32 mph.
Arthur Siyuenti can often be spotted around the county with his speed monitoring device looking like a geriatric hi-vis Rambo.
He said, ‘As soon as someone is that little bit over the speed limit, I know that they are going to get a strongly worded but ultimately pointless letter from the police, and that makes my nipples tingle if I am being honest with you.’
‘It can get a little bit awkward sometimes as the tent that I am pitching can become visible if I am wearing shorts on a hot summer’s day, but the local ladies need to realise that I am only aroused by performing my civic duty.’
‘I’ve asked the council for a flashgun to go on top – that’ll really shit ’em up.’
We asked Mr Siyuenti how he unwinds at home.
He said, ‘I trawl Facebook for images of terrible parking with a box of Kleenex, and boom goes the dynamite.’