A spokesperson for the BBC has confirmed that the classic sitcom Dad’s Army will be remade with an all-Asian cast. 

The decision was taken as a result of more than 5000 complaints received by Ofcom stating that the 70’s show is ‘non-inclusive.’

The Beeb’s commissioner of shows Narinder Rinder said, ‘This is an exciting reboot of a British institution.’

’The original Bud Flanagan theme tune has been replaced with a custom commission called Home Guard Hanahana Hananga – a Bangla piece of music to bring the show into the 21st Century.’

’It’s like Goodness Gracious Me meets Goodnight Sweetheart, with Captain Manandering having a day job in charge of the Halal butchers shop.’

‘We have also been forced to withdraw the Pike character as his name is too close to upsetting the Traveller community.’

A source within the BBC confirmed that all DVDs of the original series will be withdrawn from stores and burned at once, with the molten materials being allowed to solidify before being dumped at sea.