The owner of an entirely electric car has confirmed that he is looking forward to going on holiday no more than 20 miles away from his own home so he can get back again on a single charge.

Giles Smunge told our Chief Reporter that although he could have bought an unleaded Porsche Boxster with the same money, resulting in numerous ‘gobbles’ from local ladyfolk, he was ‘more than satisfied’ with the sensible environmentally-friendly vehicle that is ideal for creeping up unexpectedly behind groups of small children at 27 miles per hour.

He added, ‘I spent an extra year’s salary on a charging point at home, and I have calculated that between here and my local library I should be able to go and spend a week anywhere within a 20-mile radius.’

‘I originally asked the dealer for a hybrid that is part-electric, part-smug, but I was told that these won’t be on the market until 2021.’

‘It really is time that our government pulled its finger out and introduced a wider network of charging points.’

‘There must be at least seventeen of us now in the United Kingdom.’