A spokesperson for Facebook has confirmed that anyone sharing a blatant ‘Centre Parks’ holiday competition scam will be given an automatic 12-month ban.
According to the social media giant, there are concerns that the activity of sharing badly photoshopped images of 20 golden envelopes and adding comments about why you should win a four-night break because it’s been a bad year, your hamster Gerald contacted rodent Super-AIDS and you never win these things might be sending human evolution into reverse.
It is also believed that people often don’t win these things because they don’t actually fucking exist.
Facebook’s VP of User Gullibility Jeremiah Van Nincomshit said, ‘We have spoken to Center Parts directly about this issue and they have confirmed that all of these posts are complete and utter scams.’
‘They have adopted a strict ‘no competition’ policy since the company went into administration in 2017 after giving away ten short breaks including a welcome bread hamper and evening meals at Café Rouge with a combined market value of £7bn.’
‘This is how we know that all of the current competitions are fake’ Well that and the standard of English is that poor that it looks like it was written by Borat after taking several blows to the head.’
Facebook user Michelle Garridge told us that she was ‘devastated’ to hear that the latest post she had interacted with was in fact a massive like-harvesting scam.
She said, ‘I got so excited about this one because I never win nothing.’
When our reporter told her that by default she must therefore often win something, Ms Garridge considered this point for a moment before suffering an aneurysm.