A spokesperson for Facebook has confirmed that last night’s eight-hour global outage was caused by a 23-year-old woman in Southend posting to ask if anyone in her area was an Avon rep.

Shortly before 4pm, Michelle Garridge posted ‘Any1 hear an Avon repp?’ on the Southend Mums’ Mumming and Mummery group, and the resulting 455 million comments in around three minutes brought the entire social media network to its knees.

Fires were also reported at the company’s data centre in the Nevada Desert, USA.

Facebook’s VP Hermione Veepee said, ‘People need to act a little more responsibly when they post on Facebook.’

‘Because of the technical issues last night, Facebook became self-aware shortly after 10pm GMT and took remote control of every Costa Express machine in Britain.’

‘Thousands of Welcome Break customers have been horribly scalded.’