A spokesperson for Facebook has confirmed that a trial in January will place an ALERT SOCIAL SERVICES button on all posts that are published on mummy groups – there are more than 500 such groups in South Essex alone. 

Facebook’s VP of Social Enrichment and Hyperbole Heffer Rhyder said: ‘We asked 10,000 mothers on parenting groups about the one feature that they would like to see introduced on mummy pages.’

‘Almost 85% of them said that they would like a one-click solution to instantly send a photo, video or troubling message directly to a social services employee.’

‘It will save a lot of arguments when one mother suspects another mother of doing something truly horrific to their child like drawing a pair of glasses on them while they are asleep as an Elf On The Shelf plank.’

‘It will also settle a huge number of arguments that break out on there about the right way to bring up a child.’

‘If someone comes along and takes a kid away, it’s pretty much certain that the other person was correct and the commenting can be turned off by an admin user.’

Shell Garridge is a young mother of three from Fairfax Drive in Southend, and she said that the button will change her life on Facebook. 

She said: ‘This button would have been useful last week when someone posted a photo of their little boy’s rash and asked everyone what they thought might be causing it.’

‘I had this feeling that she might have been hitting him or something, but without no actual evidence or even a logical reason for hysterically screaming ‘abuse’ it might have been difficult to approach social services. This instant button will make life so much easier for concerned proxy parents like myself.’