A homeowner from Rayleigh in Essex has declared himself a ‘fully qualified gas engineer with all of the appropriate safety certificates in place’ after a local tradesman quoted him £250 for a spare boiler part including labour.

According to Timothy Shaundars, who lives on Hambro Hill with his wife Jules, he was left ‘shaking with rage’ and immediately escorted the Gas Safe Register-registered Tony Chauffage off his premises before opening YouTube and watching a video called ‘How To Fit An Internal Dripping Flue Without Killing Everyone At Home.’

Speaking exclusively to Southend News Network, Timothy slammed the ‘cartel’ that currently operates in the local area for boiler and central heating repairs.

He said, ‘That whole Gas Safe Register is just a scam to stop people saving a small fortune and fixing things themselves.’

‘It’s always been like that. They tried to pull the wool over our eyes with the whole CORGI thing a few years ago – no wonder the model car people threatened to go legal on them.’

‘I just pulled off the cover, grabbed my toolkit and found the problem in a matter of seconds.’

‘My wife kept screaming at me to stop but I knew exactly what I was doing – I used official Duck Tape and everything.’

We asked Mr Shaundars if he was concerned about Carbon Monoxide exposure in his home.

He said, ‘Stop trying to scare me. Carbon dioxide is harmless enough for humans, and Carbon monoxide only has half as many oxygen atoms in it so it’s even less so.’

‘I even put sodium chloride on my chips at lunchtime – you’ll be getting Professor Stephen Hawking to put the mockers up me about that next, won’t you?’