A 44-year-old man from Southend in Essex has been talking to Southend News Network about his struggle to find a cartoon tie that doesn’t make him look like some sort of practicing paedophile.

According to Jon Jones, he has already purchased seventeen different ties and tried them on in readiness for the upcoming Christmas party season, with little success.

He said: ‘It doesn’t matter which one I wear, every single one of them gives the impression that I have very controversial sexual tastes.’

‘Even the Daffy Duck one sets off huge ‘I live in my mother’s basement and she can afford an excellent lawyer’ alarm bells.’