The people of the United Kingdom have finally come together for one common cause – the fact that it is time for Theresa May to stop dancing around Africa looking like she needs to take an almighty shit and sort Brexit out.
You know the point when the little chap is literally touching cloth to the point where it affects your stance.
The media has been full of cringeworthy footage this week of Mrs May strutting dance moves that you would expect from your ‘does he like young boys’ uncle at a family wedding, under the banner of ‘securing Britain’s post-Brexit future with the African continent.’
It’s like watching ‘Alan Partridge Does Africa’ but 100 times more socially awkward, with viewers waiting for Mrs May to climb to the top of a rock, hold a small lion cub up and pretend to be sodding Rafiki.
Well when you’ve quite finished pratting around that neck of the woods, perhaps you could nip home and tell Dominic Raaaab and his chums to try and persuade Brussels that we could probably do with some kind of Brexit deal.
It’s not so much a ‘cliff edge’ at the moment, but more of the end of the Earth that you probably think is flat as well.
As much as I would love to start paying £17.95 for a banana and fighting my precinct’s champion for first dibs on the latest badger that has been run over on the A127, maybe we should try and sort out the whole Europe thing first.