A 34-year-old mum of two or possibly five from Southend is currently adding pointless hashtags to every single Facebook post while simultaneously being blissfully unaware that her friends don’t give a f**k.

Sharon Diqueed of Fairfax Drive told our Chief Reporter that as opposed to being an attention-seeking moron, she is actually adding hashtags to help her Facebook contacts find her messages 24/7.

She added: ‘All of my posts are friends only, but I am convinced that they spend all day searching their news feeds for the exact long-winded hashtags that I attach to photos of my two or five kids.’

‘I’m currently very fond of using #lookwhatshotoutofmyfanny.’

‘To be honest, I am trialling the same sort of behaviour in the real world as well now. Every time I say anything in public, I point at myself and jump up and down repeatedly. It’s going really well.’

Sharon’s friend Diana Additt said: ‘I tend to steer clear of hashtags as I don’t want to come across as a bit of a dick.’

‘I prefer inspirational messages on photographic backgrounds have f*ck all to do with the inspiration message.’

‘One inspirational meme I put up last week inspired my cousin to gouge out his left eyeball with a teaspoon.’